Sunday, 20 January 2008

The story of you

I suppose I should start at the beginning, Ray. In the middle of October, 2006, your dad and I started talking about having you. After a week or two of discussing we decided that it would be as good a time as any, as we had a nice home, life was calm, and you'd have a little time to grow before we moved and daddy had to go away on a ship.

So within a month, there you were, growing in my tummy!

At the start, pregnancy was very easy on me. I wasn't very sick, but I did sleep a bunch! It took a lot of energy to help you grow strong. I ate and ate and ate. Sometimes I had to eat in the middle of the night!

By mid-January we could even feel you moving. You LOVED to move, you were still so tiny that the doctor didn't believe me when I said I felt it. But it was true, daddy and I could feel your tiny, feathery kicks against our fingertips.

I was very slim before I had you, so it was easy to tell I was pregnant even early on. I was so excited to see how quick you grew just by measuring my tummy that I made daddy take alot of pictures.

Time passed slowly in the day to day, but looking back it flew. I cherish the times I spent with a hand on my tummy, sending you warm loving energy and thoughts, telling you that daddy and I were preparing a safe, loving home for you where you would be warm and comfortable and taken care of. I would lay in bed after a shower, spread lotion on my belly and laugh as you kicked at my hand. If I tried to read a book and rest it on my tummy you would knock it off.

Soon you were so big that you moved my whole stomach with your kicks. We could see the outline of your elbows and knees as you grew frustrated with the increasingly cramped living quarters. You would let me know every time you were uncomfortable, and I would obediently roll over.

You seemed so eager to be out in the world, my body began having contractions very early. At first we were a little scared, you were still so small! We found out that I was just practicing for the big day, however. In the weeks that followed I took life a little slower, making sure you were comfortable enough to stay in there and finish growing.

It was getting very hard to sleep, move, or be comfortable doing much of anything as it came close to the time for you to be born. You felt so big and heavy, but since daddy and I are small people we assumed you were probably still just a tiny guy as well.

Once we knew you were grown enough to be ready to join us we took lots of walks. The contractions were painful sometimes but they made me excited, I couldn't wait to hold you in my arms! I waited as patiently as I could and reassured you that we were ready to meet you, and that you would be safe and warm even in the big outside world.

Long after you were due, we decided that we might need a little help from the doctors to encourage you to come out. I went with daddy and grandma to the hospital early on a Tuesday. We got settled into the hospital room and they started giving me medicine to start the labour.

Things went very very slowly. The medicine was only doing half the job, I started feeling the rhythym of labor but my body was reluctant to open so you could come out. I thought, sometimes, that we would have to find another way to bring you out into the world, but everyone around me was so encouraging that you could come out on your own that I agreed to try many different things. We waited many hours, as I nibbled bits of food, talked and laughed with friends in between waves, and watched Star Wars. Daddy read a book, grandma read magazines. I found it hard to concentrate on anything but you, and so I focused on what I had to do.

After a day we were almost halfway there. Another lady came into the room next to us, and in just a few short hours we heard the cries of her new baby. I bounced on a big ball...they checked me again...still not open enough for you. I was so discouraged that I cried in daddys arms.

We took a break. I took a shower, and a nap. Ate a good meal, and talked to some friends. Late wednesday night we started again. Before they gave me more medicine they broke my water, all the warm fluid you'd been living in the last 9 months came rushing out. The doctor and nurse talked to us quietly in the darkened room and we laughed. More medicine and last, things were happening!

I didn't have much time to rest in between the waves, I moaned through the pain and held onto daddy or grandma for strength. After a while I got lost, and asked for help. Grandma kept me calm and held me while they gave me something to ease the pain. At last, a little relief. I rested a little whenever I could, but you were still coming.

Early thursday morning I was ready to start pushing! You would join us soon! I was very concentrated on what was happening within as you prepared to come out into the world. Everyone helped support me as I pushed, and pushed HARD! After two hours you seemed so close to being born, daddy and grandma could even see the top of your head!

Then things slowed down again. I pushed and pushed, the doctor and nurse and grandma and daddy said "Just one more, he's RIGHT there! Just one more!". But after two hours, and many 'one more's later, you hadn't moved far. We tried everything, even a giant suction cup on your head! But you were stuck!

Slowly, slowly, the contractions stopped. I signed some papers, and they let me relax a little while. I had done all I could, I was so very, very tired. I kept pushing for a little while because my body still told me it was what I had to do. I so wanted to push until you came sliding out! They laid me down, and pushed my bed to a different room with alot of bright lights. It was cold in there, so they covered me with warm blankets.

They made sure I was good and comfortable, and then they washed off my belly. Daddy came into the room with me and stood near my head. The doctors worked quickly but carefully, they had to make a new way for you to come out. After twenty minutes lying there, we heard you cry! You were so loud and annoyed that we brought you out of your dark, warm, cozy home in my belly. The doctors exclaimed, "Well no wonder, he has to be at least nine or ten pounds! He's so BIG!"

You were so big, they had to make a new, special way to come out! If you look, you can still see the line where you were born. You cried and cried until you met your daddy. He calmed you down while the nurses made sure you were healthy. After a few minutes daddy carried you over to me, snuggled in a warm blanket, quiet and alert. Daddy thinks you were squished up and a little silly looking at first, but I don't think I've ever seen a more beautiful baby.

That is how you were born.

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