Well DER ME

So I had a big fat DUH moment the other night. Anthony, Emily and I were watching the Business of Being Born (excellent, everyone needs to see this flick) and Anthony said again how he doesn't want to be around for the next birth, at all. He said he's fine with it being a homebirth and all that, it wouldn't change if I were in the hospital, he just gets sooooo nervous thinking of me in labor. (He's a protector through and through, I can't fault him for that!) I plan on surrounding myself with some of my closest ladies, so it's really not the end of the world for me.

He also feels really bad I missed the first hour with Ray (gets quite upset about that) and says I should be allowed some alone time with the next one. He's a sweety.

Anyway, I already knew all this. The big old DUH moment was this: it's no wonder I didn't go into labor! I've been telling people right and left (when they're unsure of who to allow into the labor room) that a few different things can "go wrong" on that front. Mom can hold up labor with her own reservations/fears/random other emotional hangups. A person the woman is uncomfortable with coming into the room can also slow/stall labor. And, last but not least, someone in the room who is very nervous/worried can have an effect on things.

Now please understand that Anthony DID want me to go into labor, this was of course nothing conscious on his part. Nor on mine. But being a big fat empath I am very highly tuned to his frequency, as it were. Soemthing will happen, he'll say it doesn't bother him or he doesn't care, and I'm the one who doesn't sleep for a month because he's turmoil inside.

So this...this makes ALOT of sense. Especially considering some of the "false" starts I had, and precisely when they stopped...how anxious he was to get to the hospital...so yes, he will be FAR away for the next one. Once baby time hits I'll have Shannapance come down for a weekend, perhaps, and send Anthony up to play video games with Ryan, and we'll get that party started.

(I am at times also very well tuned to Shanna, and at the end of the pregnancy with Ray just IM'ing her on msn was enough to make my contractions stronger and painful. So the effect with Anthony is not isolated!)

This realization is VERY reassuring to me. I've looked around a bit learning about having an irritable uterus (which I most certainly do) and if a woman has it with the first it's common for it to happen again with subsequent pregnancies. I asked the midwife I would likely see in san diego about it online, and she said it's also common for a woman with an irritable uterus to have trouble developing a strong effective contraction pattern for labor. Since you can't induce a VBAC because of the much-increased risk of uterine rupture, that would possibly leave me high and dry for a VBAC. Knowing that it probably wasn't 100% my body gives me alot more confidence that the next time I CAN do it on my own. :)

Thank you AMA/ACOG, but I think NOT.

Dunno how many of you keep up with current news in the birthing world, but there's some scary shit going on. I haven't been blogging much on it since most every birth blog I know of has said it all, and far more eloquently than I. However, I feel that every one, whether they're part of the birthing community, have children, don't have them, male, female, old or young, needs to know about this. I'd like to think that this is all utterly unconstitutional and so shall never be passed, but these days I've lost more than a little faith in the government. I think the Big Push for Midwives said it perfectly when they called this fiasco "Big Brother meets Father Knows Best".

The AMA (American Medical Association) has joined the ACOG (American College of Gynecologists) in frowning heavily on homebirth, and gone a step further in suggesting that legislation be introduced that "supports" the notion that the safest place for birthing and the post-partum period is in the hospital.

I mean...wow. Just wow. It seems every day that passes makes this country a more scary place to live.

The quote in full: (emphasis mine)

Whereas, Twenty-one states currently license midwives to attend
home births, all using the certified professional midwife (CPM)
credential (CPM or "lay midwives), not the certified midwives (CM)
credential which both the American College of Obstetricians and
Gynecologists (ACOG) and American College of Nurse Midwives (ACNM)
recognize[1]; and

Whereas,
There has been much attention in the media by celebrities having home
deliveries, with recent Today Show headings such as Ricki Lake takes on
baby birthing industry: Actress and former talk show host shares her
at-home delivery in new film [2]; and

Whereas,
An apparently uncomplicated pregnancy or delivery can quickly become
very complicated in the setting of maternal hemorrhage, shoulder
dystocia, eclampsia or other obstetric emergencies, necessitating the
need for rigorous standards, appropriate oversight of obstetric
providers, and the availability of emergency care, for the health of
both the mother and the baby during a delivery; therefore be it

RESOLVED,
That our American Medical Association support the recent American
College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) statement that the
safest setting for labor, delivery, and the immediate post-partum
period is in the hospital, or a birthing center within a hospital
complex, that meets standards jointly outlined by the American Academy
of Pediatrics (AAP) and ACOG, or in a freestanding birthing center that
meets the standards of the Accreditation Association for Ambulatory
Health Care, The Joint Commission, or the American Association of Birth
Centers [3] (New HOD Policy); and be it further

RESOLVED,
That our AMA develop model legislation in support of the concept that
the safest setting for labor, delivery, and the immediate post-partum
period is in the hospital, or a birthing center within a hospital
complex, that meets standards jointly outlined by the AAP and ACOG, or
in a freestanding birthing center that meets the standards of the
Accreditation Association for Ambulatory Health Care, The Joint
Commission, or the American Association of Birth Centers. (Directive to
Take Action)

Fiscal Note: Implement accordingly at estimated staff cost of $1,929.

Received: 04/28/08

The thought of having CPS take my children because I chose to give birth at home with a midwife is absolutely terrifying to me.

I think I'll clarify a little in regards to my Lemmings post. I don't think I came across as well as I hoped, but I was not specifically calling into question the use of pain medications during birth, so much as how quickly women (myself included, sadly) are prepared to submit themselves to the medicalisation of what could be a normal birth, in a healthy female with an uncomplicated pregnancy, without pause or question.

Also, the lack of information that women recieve during their prenatals, and in discussions of medical interventions, either during the birth or before hand. Many people feel that they should be able to trust their doctors implicitly, as knowledgable care providers that only recommend safe, thoroughly-tested care, or, if there are risks, then they will give those to you as well. Perhaps this is more pervasive in the doctor/patient relationship when it comes to sickness. But this is sadly, quite often untrue when we're talking about an OB informing a pregnant patient.

There is a long, frightening history of doctors using untried methods to improve birth that seem like they would be a good idea.

For example, using x-ray on pregnant women to determine pelvic size. For one, pelvic size before labor is generally unreliable, as the pelvis expands to allow the baby to pass through. (Not to mention pushing/birthing in certain positions will expand the pelvis - squatting, for example - or narrow it - pushing on your back, knees pulled back to your ears) A few years, and far too many dead/deformed babies later, they said, "Hey! Perhaps exposing a fetus to strong radiation in utero is not the best plan after all!".

Pain medications are being tested on women and unconsenting, uninformed babies, during labor. There is NO research to suggest that it is safe for the baby. The research that has been done to date has alot more to do with changing doses (so as to reduce the harmful effects on the baby, that alone admitting that there ARE effects) with regards to maternal "satisfaction". Not safety, SATISFACTION. There's a very interesting blog post I found recently (and the whole blog is outstanding) about the research that is(n't) going on in this area. Please to be checking it out. :)

Anyways, I needs me some sleep. Weee I have internet still! They did cut our long distance, but at least we have this connection to the world still. :)

I was right!

I got my records from the hospital today.

I was looking through the (very few) notes about the labor/birth. It mentioned Ray's head being "asynclitic" before we did the c-section.

(Asynclitic usually meaning the head is tilted slightly, more generally it can even mean breech or posterior. Basically anything that may not be considered conducive to an easy labor, and contributes to dystocia.)

I've been wondering about this recently. Ray had a welt on his head after he was born, which scabbed over. Unfortunately I don't have any pictures on here or I'd show you. We did try the vacuum, and it popped off three times. It can be assumed that it was from the vacuum. Normally, the flat part of the top of your head, towards the back, is what presents first. The welt on Ray's head was behind and just above his ear. That's a serious tilt.

What could have been done? Alot. :( For starters, moving during the labor, as I wanted to. Walking, hip swaying/shaking, bouncing on the birthing ball, lunges. Also, not breaking my water. If the baby is not in a good position when it's done, breaking it can sometimes seal them in that unfavorable position. It's still possible for them to shift, but it's not as easy. (Not to mention the more obvious risk of cord prolapse if the baby is not "engaged" in the pelvis.)

Mostly? Just not being induced to begin with. *sigh*

ETA: An interesting article on spinningbabies.com on asynclitism in labor and what can be done to help.

It's getting awfully scary around here

I was reading a post yesterday about obstetricians performing c-sections under court order.

Wow. I'm almost speechless. And I'm furious. This means that pregnant women have fewer rights (medically speaking) than dead bodies. You can't do shit to a body without consent.

This whole deal of placing the unborn childs needs before the mother is...shaky. It's a nice idea, but in practice? A frightening breach of human rights. Especially in a supposedly pro-choice country. The idea that the woman in the article could likely have shown up to that hospital a few months earlier and had that same baby, who was in "grave danger", and have it aborted, and would not have received a second look...it's beyond me. I'm not here to debate abortion, it's an awfully sticky subject.

But the idea that a woman, simply because she is pregnant, can not be trusted to weigh her options, risks, and make the best choice for her AND her baby is sad and about 4000 steps in the wrong direction.

As a woman who is hoping for an HBAC in the next few years, the idea is especially troubling.

And people want to hand over the reins of the medical industry to the government? I'm moving far, far, far away.

And that quickly, it's over.

Well I didn't stick with it long, but I think I'm going to have to put off the screening business. (AKA, not do it.) I would so love to do it here but we have two months to get out of here and I'm already twitchy about that. Plus Ray and the house and well basically, I'm already in as deep as I can swim. I suppose my crusading will have to wait for another day.

Plus with the way this community is...only one real hospital and not alot of options as far as midwives go...the people I would need the most support from is the hospital and I think it'd be an awkward and difficult thing to get their help, add to the fact that it's a military hospital and officers and it's all so damned political.


Bleh.

Gypsy market was nice. It was fun to stroll a bit in the sun and look at all the nifty stuff. Quite a bit of fabric there but nothing that caught my eye. Ran a few other errands, came home for Ray to nap, and then ran some more this evening. Commissary, video rental and so on. I just put the Bug down at 9:30 (10pm now) and I don't know if he'll stay asleep. I'm sooooo tired. He went down at 11pm-ish last night but my mind was on overdrive and I couldn't fall asleep till 2am. Then Anthony was up before 7 (which woke me) and Ray woke to eat just after he left. I was in bed again at 8am but then Anthony came home twenty minutes later and I dozed till about 9:20 and then Ray was up.

I guess I'll go shower, try and unwind.

Ah, the crusades!

Well, Anthony's officially done it. He encouraged me, and off I go!

I was ranting (again!) about The Business of Being Born. A site I frequent the forums of (well, one thread really) had a very short, rather sensational debate-starting article on the movie. If you can call three paragraphs headed by "IS C-SECTION BAD?" an article. (Please note my disgust here.) A bazillion women who know nothing about the movie took the title and ran with it and started the age old debate of "C-section is all about the outcome, be glad you have a healthy baby!" and the timeless favorite, "You don't get medals for natural (pain-med free) childbirth! It's all the same!!".

If I beat my head against a wall to show how much these kinds of statements drive me EFFING BATSHIT I think my head would vaporize, somehow. Don't ask me how, but I would achieve it.

So anyway, the movie is only showing in a very few select theaters (and community screenings) before its dvd/netflix release in March.

Anthony said, "Well...host a community screening!".

So now I'm pondering who to talk to to accomplish such a feat before we leave. I think it's totally doable and affordable. My one hiccup is if possible I'd like to do a Q & A afterwards but it'll take a little digging to find the right person to do that. Anyway, that's my excitement for the day.

Planning a trip with Stacy to the gypsy market tomorrow morning. It's right outside the gate and has a ton of nifty cheap stuff. Clothes, local olives (insert immense quantities of drool here), fabric, bedding, some other craft stuff, underwears, panty hose (VERY colorful, I need to just buy a ton of cool ones), kids clothes...and all very very cheap. I'm talking 2-3E for a bra or pair of shoes. Now of course, some of it is terribly cheap as far as craftsmanship as well but it's still fun to poke around.

After that I think I'll stop in at the maternity ward at the hospital and FINALLY hand over the picture I have of Ray for the 2007 Babies board. Been meaning to give it to them for, well, 5 months now and you know how it goes.

Ray has been alternately a fusspot and a crazy excited squirmy thing of joy today. He did very well at the Wings cook-off at Anthony's work earlier today, napped a little after...he's just so off and on with ME. I feel terrible but sometimes I have to leave the room with him on the floor just so he'll play! He plays happily, notices me, "Waaaaaaaaaaahhhh!" until I hold him and cuddle him. Completely fine if I stay out of sight. Blargh! I think he's teething again.

ETA: THIS is the offending article. The comments make me die a little inside, for the most part. *sigh* I don't even know why they mentioned the movie because the header and then the debate question are really a bit off the mark considering the supposed content of the movie. (Going by info from the movies site, numerous other reviews, and the trailer.)

I have a big mouth

This poor gal that I scarcely know from BMSynagogue just hit her due date. I say "poor" because I just wrote her an unsolicited small novel about empowerment or inductions or something. I try to keep my opinions to myself on such topics (unless it's something glaringly wrong, obviously) and don't give too much advice unless it's requested.

However, few things tick me off more than hospitals badgering perfectly healthy women and babies into unecessary procedures, especially inductions, which bear so much inherent risk and lead so often to c-section. I know it's the latest rage these days to Type A the whole shebang and play God, set your babies birthday yourself because you like the numbers or you don't want to miss your hair appointment or whatever the hell. Elective inductions, don't get me started.

But inducing at 41 weeks and claiming the poor girl is overdue? Please. Assuming her fluid levels are good, placenta still healthy and baby is normal, no high BP...there's no reason. ESPECIALLY when they KNOW that the "due date" is a flexible number to begin with, and the added statistics that show heavily that women on average go 7-10 days past their due date with a first child. Really, they should probably just revise the damn info and make 41 weeks the average gestation. Whatever.

So I tried not to be too preachy and didn't throw out too much info, rather encouraged her to do her own research and you know, believe in herself and follow her heart and all that mushy shit. I cannot stress enough that I barely know this woman. Like, we've shared a few jokes at youth group and some lovetaps on the rear and that's pretty much the depth of our relationship. Oh well, she can hate me but if something I say helps her have a better birth then woohoo!

Ok, I'm going to add in here what I HATED about the induction. I didn't like the hospital setting overall, really, because it made me feel like there was something WRONG with me. It absolutely goes against everything I believe about birth. Obviously, there is a time and a place (Ray's birth was one of them) for interventions, doctors and all that. But I think America has reached (and far surpassed) a point where they're just making too many things into diseases and problems and things that need to be fixed with unnatural chemicals, scalpels, and machines. Back to basics people, especially with something so very much a part of life as birth. Go find a midwife and give her a freaking hug or something.